I have had moments today where I'm at a loss for direction. The reality that summer ends today, school begins tomorrow, fall is in the air, and soon I can have my own rhythms and patterns again is strange, almost uncomfortable.

When you parent special needs kids, the amount of energy you expend over the course of a summer, with a large majority of it having nothing to do with your personal interests or well being, can turn you into an exhausted heap. The last 4 days or so I've also been pretty sick and sleepless. To imagine long stretches of uninterrupted sleep is just wild.

I love my family, don't ever misunderstand that. But there is something to be said, though, for finding balance from within... something that is uniquely mine, alone.

Oh... AND CONTAINS QUIET.

So I hope it wraps back around to a familiar feeling again... a feeling that isn't tied up in guilt for wanting time for myself. I may be a mother, but I am also a person. And that person needs a serious break.

Happy Back-To-School to all the exhausted special needs parents everywhere, and God bless the special needs teachers!